Is Anybody Out There?

I can't believe the summer is almost over. And I can't believe how much has happened this summer--good and bad. In fact, I've thought about three times a week of things I wanted to write here, then didn't. I guess the rest of you are like that, too, huh? Well, now that summer is almost over and I'm getting back to a regular schedule of some sort, I'm going to try to post here more regularly.

For starters, here is how my August went.

1) Returned from the States on the 5th, said good bye to Tim on the 6th. Okay, maybe you all already know this kind of thing, but I'm slower than the rest of you. I really missed my husband this summer. Of course I've always loved Tim, but for the first time, I understand what people mean when a spouse dies and they say there is a hole in their lives as a result. In the 16 years of our marriage, Tim and I have never been separated for more than a day or two. It was weird Whenever something happened, he wasn't here to tell, when I read something of interest, he wasn't there to share it with, we didn't have our long discussions about politics or kids or work or whatever, he wasn't around to make us laugh, and he wasn't here to hook up the computer to the TV! There was literally something missing in my life, but it didn't have the permanency with it that a death or divorce would entail, so it was like being in limbo. And then, when he came back, everything just fit back into place. It was a real eye-opener for me.

2) I had another fight. This time with some jerk involved with Democrats Abroad. Maybe it was because of my trip home and all the emotions that went with going through some old papers that included the emails, memos and missives that Jeff and I sent back to each other, but when this guy with DAJ started acting like a jerk and making accusations, I just latched on and went after him. Maybe I over reacted, and quite honestly, most of you don't even know what I'm writing about, but the details don't matter, because the thing that bothers me is that I, once again, got involved in a fight/discussion with someone that was not that important. I always say that when someone (like Molly) always has similar relationship problems or recurring fights with someone, then that person should look to themselves to see how they are causing and/or contributing to the problem. Well, that means me, too. Tim always tells to be a duck, let it roll off, and that is a good philosophy, but when I feel something is unfair or just wrong, I can't do that. This guy wrote to a bunch of people insinuating that I and some other members involved in DAJ were acting unfair, undemocratically and unethically. It sounds like something that needed a response, and had he sent it to our membership, then it probably would have required a response. But it was to a small group of people, in the overall scheme of things, it wasn't that important, but at the time, I couldn't let it go. Not because I was offended or angry, but because it was just wrong and I hate passive aggressive people who insinuate and imply things and dirty a situation with negative, subtle undertones. I guess that is why I hate Molly so much. So the real question is, did I take out on that guy all the frustration and negative emotions that I brought back to Japan from my stay with Molly? The simple answer would be yes, but then since I often jump at the same bait, I'm not sure the answer is so simple. Anyway, maybe this is all a little too personal for this kind of blog, but thanks for letting rant/vent. You should have heard my internal discussions two weeks ago--they were NOT so reasonable or logical.

3) All kinds of weird things have happened to me this month. I got a weird, weird, weird, sexually suggestive email from a person who I admire and respect but who is a work contact, and I still don't know how to respond to this. I waited until Tim got home, but now I'm afraid to talk to Tim about it because he knows this person. I found out that a friend of mine, who broke his neck two years ago actually did it by crashing his head through the wall of his apartment and then he had to lay there, with his head in the wall and unable to call for help, for 26 hours until someone stopped by to see why he wasn't answering his phone. Another person who I don't know that well ask me for a lot of money. My leg still hurts...

4) Enough of the bad stuff. On the plus side, I soooooooo enjoyed seeing my friends again this summer. You all have a life full of each other and your dear friends, but it really meant so much to me to be able to spend time, even of only a few hours, with all of you. It's the thing that helped me get through all the other crap that happened while back home. Laura and I had a wonderful time together doing girly things, I started a new hobby of making beads I'm uploading pictures of them next time), and Laura and I are hooked on Project Runway. We saw Tim Gunn on the Daily Show a couple of weeks ago and checked out season 1. We just finished season 2 last night, and I don't know if we'll have time to watch anymore, but it was a fun thing for us to do together. And I was elected again to be Secretary of Democrats Abroad Japan. Those things don't have as much to write about, but they are the things that daily life is made up of, and the things that we'll remember much longer than the bad stuff.

Linda

Earthquakes and typhoons

I don't usually have long term trouble with jet lag, but I've been home now for a week and am still not sleeping properly. I've been waking up at 4/4:30 every day, and since I'm wide awake, I just get out of bed. Laura has been having a hard time falling to sleep, but the little devil sleeps until 9 or 10 in the morning.

So, since I've been home, we've had two earthquakes and a typhoon. The epicenter of one earthquake was just about 20 miles from our area so it was felt pretty strongly. Have any of you felt an earthquake? It is a weird feeling. I get a momentary rush of adrenalin, then depending on the strength of the quake, either sit still and wonder if I'm going to have to rush to a doorway or I immediately rush to a doorway. The kids always seem to be asleep when we experience a quake, so then I worry about whether I'll be able to get to them in the case of a severe quake. Yesterday, morning, I was sitting in my undies, so then I had the added worry about whether there were any clothes nearby to jump into in case the quake was severe. Anyway, all of that is the mental part. Then, it is a freaky feeling to have your house shaking. If you live in a high rise, I imagine it must be an awful feeling to see everything swaying so much. My legs get wobbly and stay that way for about a half hour after the quake stops. And my brain feels the same way after a short quake (yesterday's was about 20 seconds, the night before about 10) as it does after an afternoon of sailing. In other words, I feel like the ground is still moving.

Before I moved to Japan, I always wondered how people could live in a place that has such frequent quakes, where they know that it is inevitable that they will someday experience a big one. But now that we live here, I realize that you don't even think about it until it happens. I mean, we may think about the possibility of a quake when we put breakable items out on a shelf, or when moving furniture to make sure heavy things aren't over the bed or anything, but otherwise. I never think or worry about the possibility of a big quake. Even after the earthquakes, as soon as the physical symptoms disappear, I don't think of them anymore.

How about you all? For those of you who live in Japan, do you worry about them? Has anyone else experienced a big quake or natural disaster that upset you mentally and disturbed you physically?

Linda

Sorry to Be Absent

work on the wine bar and catering kitchen continue!

here- take a look at our new logo. We are going for art-deco 1920's-30's Japan.